Okay. So now that I’m 25 – people have started asking me… you know. The question everybody knows after you hit 25: “Marriage?” “Kids?” “Your long-term career goals?”. Yes... these questions.
Just though I'd let you know that it is ok to be single at 25, mostly to the one's that are still kicking around solo. In my opinion, there is somewhat of a stigma around this subject – and the truth of the matter is that it doesn’t matter (at all) where you are at in life at 25. What truly matters is that you are doing something that makes you happy, something that motivates you or gives you purpose. I thought I’d share with you, where I am currently in life. So here it is. My relationship status:
I realized that I nobody else can make me happier than myself - which kind of sounds self explanatory, I know. However, it was not always this way for me. I’ve had very different relationships throughout my teenage / early twenties. All of which, I have learned so much from.
One of the main things I have learned throughout these relationships is that you can’t depend on someone else to make you happy. Putting that weight on someone else’s shoulders will most likely push them further away. I’ve been in relationships where I’ve been that person and vice versa. What I’ve come to realize the most is that I needed to love myself enough to respect myself and the other person enough to not let them carry my “baggage” or have this the other way around.
I've learned to accept my flaws and embrace my imperfections - as every woman should - before committing to any serious relationship.
Priority #1 : Me, Myself & I
We have our body & mind to live with for the rest of our lives. Therefore, I've decided to devote my time doing things that I enjoy and remove myself from the things that no longer make me feel happy. My choices reflect me and what I want for MY future. Whether this is career related or with my relationships.
Healthy relationships are based on mutual respect. Having mutual respect between you, your friends, your boyfriend, your coworker/bosses are so important. I would not be where I am today without the support of the people I am surrounded by. I realized how much this made a huge difference in my personal & work life, as well as in my productiveness. That is why I choose to surround myself with only the best.
People who love and support you - no matter what - will truly bring positive outcomes and make for long lasting relationships & friendships.
Falling hard for life
Life is short, try to make the best of it. Even though life has its ups and downs, every day is a gift we get to live. There are so many things to be grateful for. Your friends, family, mother nature, art, music, etc. – those are all things you can explore and appreciate. Believe me when I say that you will feel so fulfilled with all of these.
It’s important to learn how to appreciate life and to not dwell on the things you don’t have and appreciate what you do have. My mom used to tell me to write down 3 things I am grateful for every day – I used to think this was pointless – but come to find out that this makes all the difference in my days now. Even after a bad day, there is always something positive to look up to.
Controlling my Future
How you choose to react to things will have such a huge impact in your everyday life. If there is anything that I have learned is that emotions & feelings are just temporary. So, if you’re feeling like shit one day, it doesn’t mean you should treat everyone like it too. When I am feeling stressed, angry, sad or what have you, I always try to reflect on why I am feeling that way before reacting to it. I’m not saying that I have mastered this yet (I'm still human). But it has helped me to reflect on my emotions and feelings on a deeper level – which has brought me to accept who I am as a person and to work on my weaknesses.
You cannot control how other’s treat you – but you can control how you react and you have control over your actions. Sometimes, reacting too quickly can resurface with feelings of regret or guilt. Personally, I find writing things down before I say or do anything, helps.
You get to choose the life you want to live. Although it may not always seem that way – you CAN make the decision to walk away from anything or anyone who doesn’t serve you. You know, it’s like they say: "if you are not happy, move - you are not a tree".
Once again, thanks for checking in with me today my lovelies.